I am writing from the perspective of a follower and future leader. At a young age, I made a point to observe, listen, and respect the role models that I noticed who were particularly successful in business and life. I have been blessed by their lectures and knowledge which they have shared with me over years. So what is the success to creating leaders through mentoring?

The mentoring process starts with a great leader who enjoys passing on experience and knowledge to their followers.  If there is someone you want to mentor or someone who seeks advice from you, make sure you ask their permission. Permission mentoring is a process that creates and evolves aspiring leaders.  Some individuals don’t want to be coached, or are not ready for instruction at that particular time, so asking for permission is key.  Creating agreements is an effective process in mentoring.  Having willing agreements with employees/followers will help the accountability process.  Most importantly, when setting agreements, try to avoid establishing outcomes. Instead, agree on direction, activities, and conduct.  The mentoring process should set aside uninterrupted time.  During the appointment, recognize specific actions that deserve praise.  As a follower, you really appreciate if your mentor is involved in your development and acknowledges your successes as well as failures.  Lastly, measure your results and make changes when needed.  This is a life long process; the greater the communication is between the two parties, the greater the outcome.

CRUX: Great leaders create followers; excellent leaders create leaders! Ask permission, set an agreement, stay involved and measure your results.

Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.” – John Cosby


There are many reasons a customer could be acting difficult.  Understanding why will make it easier to satisfy their needs.  This topic is closely related to a recent post on active listening because being able to listen will help you manage a difficult customer.  How successful you are in coming to an agreement will dictate if they stay a customer or leave for a competitor. So, how do we deal with a difficult customer?

It is very important to remain calm and not play into the emotions of a customer.  Sometimes the confrontation is heated, however maintaining logic rather than engaging their emotions will help you manage the situation.  It is very important to let the customer vent while not interrupting.  Once the customer has finished, restate the customer’s emotions and accept their point view while trying to find common agreement.  We want to turn the negative situation into something positive and while creating a common understanding.  Display empathy, we want to avoid words that are emotional triggers such as: can’t, no, I don’t know, and policy.  Lastly, we want to resolve the situation.  We need to confront issues and create a resolution.  People like hearing their name, so use it. Offer to help and get them to state what would create a resolution.  When I worked in the hotel industry, we had a 100% satisfaction guarantee policy. Although rarely used, this was a vital tool to successfully offer a resolution.  Ultimately, it brings great pleasure to a customer if they are able to suggest the resolution.  Ask the customer, “What can I do to resolve the situation?” or “what would be fair to you?”  Listening is the most important tool to having great customer service.

CRUX: Listen around the edges, understand their feelings and emotions.  Engage logically while confronting issues and finding a resolution.

Customers don’t expect you to be perfect. They do expect you to fix things when they go wrong.”  -DONALD PORTER


Becoming an effective leader starts with communicating at a higher level. Too often we hear about supervisors being horrible communicators and we need to reverse this trend. In doing so, we must discuss the basic fundamental skills of communication. Although elementary, having the proper foundation will benefit and enhance your relationship with your employees. The five terms for becoming connected are: think, purpose, point, benefits, and questions.

One of the first lessons we learn as children is to think first and then speak. This is a very basic concept however we tend to get caught up in our emotions and overreact without thinking first. Looking to understand the purpose of the message is why it is important to listen and more importantly actively listen. Keeping a conversation short and sweet will make it easy to get your point across while not getting off topic. While connecting we need to translate our words into a message that benefits our listeners. Staying active in the conversation will show interest so make sure to ask questions!

CRUX: The responsibilities of connected leaders are: listen more, care more, and commit to connecting more with people.

                  “Communication is the real work of leadership” – Nitin Nohria


 How many of us have found ourselves in a conversation and yet we don’t even know what that other person is saying?  You have zoned out and started thinking about  lunch or what you are doing this weekend and only to key back in when you hear something that catches your attention. Or even better yet, a question comes to mind so you do everything in your power to retain your thought and in doing so you are actually trying not to listen in order to remember your question.  Why are we taught to read, write, & speak but not to listen?  Without effectively listening, communication begins to vanish! 

The truth is, this is more common than not.  When it comes to being more effective communicators I believe we can all improve our listening skills. Here are 6 steps to become a more active listener:

1)      Distraction- Consider your location and individuals around when you are listening. Are you distracted?  A busy coffee shop may not be the most effective place for you to meet for a meeting.  If you are distracted easily, recognize this and consider a place where you can stay focused.

2)      Eye Contact- Let the speaker know you are listening and you do this by giving feed back with your eyes. You are now acknowledging the speaker and the message are of importance.

3)      Timing- Too often we are consumed with a project or focused on a task and we can’t be there to listen. Rather than adopting partial listening, politely let them know this isn’t a good time. Make yourself available, but chose the time

4)      Feelings v. Content- There are two levels which conversations operate: issue based and emotional based.  By reading between these two issues you will know if it is right to move forward with a question or statement. If not, wait and address it at a more appropriate time.

5)      Cues- Using both verbal and non-verbal cues are key letting the speaker know you are focused. Being engaged and asking questions and giving feed back will not only help you stay focused but allows you to guide the conversation and in doing so you are keeping control.

6)      Summarize- Come to an agreement on the conversation and layout the next steps. By taking action after the conversation you are demonstrating that you care and you were listening.

CRUX: Listening is not easy! Do the little things that will help you stay focused and engage in the conversation.

  “The ear of the leader must ring with the voices of the people.” — Woodrow Wilson

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