Communication


Too often we find ourselves in a system that is flawed by organizational road blocks.  Set in their ways, managers insist that , “it’s my way or the highway.”  The inefficiencies in the system are a failure of management to see how today’s problems are a product of yesterday’s solutions.  Typically system failures are often ignored, employees become frustrated and often leave, feedback is undervalued and little or no change occurs.  Often we are told and encouraged to think creativity, except when it comes to challenging the system.  To speak out puts a target on your back and could possibly be grounds for dismissal no matter how valuable you maybe to the organization.  For some it is simply easier to go through the motions than to put the time and energy into creating a learning organization.  Where is our leader?

While completing my MBA in 2010 from the University of Nevada,  I had the pleasure of reading Peter Senge’s book The Fifth Discipline: The Art & Practice of The Learning OrganizationIt elaborated on the 5 disciplines’:  system thinking, achieving personal mastery, shifting mental modes, building shared vision, and team learning.  Senge is hopeful these 5 disciplines’ will create waves of experimentation, advancement, and hopefully “learning organizations” in which “people continually expand their capacity to create results they truly desire.”  That being said, leaders need to continue to challenge the status quo and look at ways to improve the system.   Singe concludes, “the systems viewpoint is generally oriented toward the long-term view. That’s why delays and feedback loops are so important.  In the short term, you can often ignore them; they’re inconsequential. They only come back to haunt you in the long term.”  Don’t wait for someone else, take a proactive approach and help find resolve now rather than later.

In the post Don’t Miss Your Big Picture, Bret Simmons discusses how “seeing the big picture” is the ability to understand  how to take actions today that will produce significant and lasting results now and in the future.  He firmly believes that anyone who masters the discipline of systems thinking will be a much better leader than someone who only sees their situations as snapshots.  I cannot agree more with this previous sentence.   Becoming a greater systems thinker, you will become a better leader and others will begin to see your value.

So, why do we continue to quietly mutter among ourselves instead of being proactive?  Are we afraid of the ramifications for speaking out?  If we stand united, determined to find resolve, we can ultimately fix the problem.  This is not easy, especially in egotistical corporate structure where everyone is vying for more control and power.  One way to stimulate change is to simply ask questions in a non-threatening manner.  Another way is to gain a consensus among fellow employees by kicking around ideas how to make the system better.  Too often companies fail to bring the appropriate voices into a committee but rather create subsystems that perpetuate the actual problems.  I would like to hear your input and how you have navigated these rocky waters to improve your system.

CRUX: Continually challenge the status quo by questioning your current system.  By being and thinking outside the box,  we will continue to help the organization excel.  Discovering which approach works best and timing your suggestions will help you continue to change your system from a non-threatening leadership role.

“Every human has four endowments- self awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom… The power to choose, to respond, to change.” -Stephen Covey

Do you have a brand?  Does your web presence promote your value?  Maybe we should ask, what is your value?  Having a passion and interest in something is a start but where do we go from there…

Over the last few months I created a brand and have began blogging, commenting, using Twitter, Facebook, and Linkedin to communicate my thoughts and ideas.  Here are a few tips and ideas I have learned.

What is your value?  I believe the first step in the process is having a clear understanding of what is that you want to contribute.  This is the hardest part of the process, I remember struggling with this idea for a few weeks and finally I decided I wanted to focus my passion on leadership and more importantly “how leaders should lead.” You may want to focus your value around your career and what you can contribute to others.  You maybe a salesman,  realtor, student, or someone looking to change careers.

Okay, our value has been established, where do we go next?  The next step is to create a blog and start capturing your thoughts.  Putting your thoughts to writing and posting them for the world to read, comment, and critique is a very humbling experience. Don’t get caught up in what others may think, these are your ideas and a this is a way to simply capture your thoughts.  Give yourself permission and don’t wait for the others to give you approval.  Remember, although you are posting it to the web it does NOT have to perfect.  It is going to be a while before others start reading your blog so don’t fumble over the idea that it needs to perfect.  Be clear and direct; longer is not better.  Pick a topic you are passionate about: sit down, capture your thoughts, proofread, and publish.

Where do we go next?  The best place to find value in the social media circle is on Twitter.  Many people are there to share, interact, and engage in conversation.  Read other blogs around your value and feel free to comment.  You will find that most people in the twitter world are there because they enjoy learning, engaging, and helping others. Take advantage of this and ask for advice.

Utilizing the social networking sites such as Facebook and Linkedin can also be powerful avenues to express your thoughts.  Although Facebook is a way to get your message out, it can damage your creditability as well as others. People can spot a fake a mile away so be genuine with your thoughts and find something that you are passionate about.

When it comes to differentiating yourself from the competition one edge you could take is using the internet to make yourself standout.  With the social networking sites such as myspace, facebook, and twitter we have began to open up to the idea of putting pictures and comments on the web for everyone else to see.  Unfortunately, if you are looking for a job you may have shot yourself in the foot because of the very web presences that you display.  I believe we were programmed to think “myspace”  was our own private space, when actually anyone with the internet could access what you posted.  If you didn’t have your settings set to private, you are completely exposed to anyone who maybe  interested.  So how do you create a positive web presence?

CRUX: Who are you? How do you want others to perceive you? Your web presence is a snap shot of who you are and how other see you.  This becomes a very valuable tool when searching for job or starting a new career path. Use the internet to create an edge for yourself over the competition.

“By giving people the power to share, we’re making the world more transparent.” -Mark Zuckerberg

Previously, we set the ground work for establishing connections and maintaining rapport as an effective starting point when it comes to networking.  When most people hear the word networking, they may think of a local chamber commerce meeting or a cocktail party, boring small talk, and just what to use when leaving early. However, networking is how most people get clients, find employees, a new restaurant spot, a place to vacation, and most importantly it is the basis for developing relationships.  Regardless if you are an introvert or extrovert, you can be successful at networking. It is just a matter of figuring out your style.  What is your philosophy on networking?

How do you feel about meeting new people? Do you dread the thought? Or, do you look forward to engaging conversation everywhere, all the time?

The main underlining message behind networking is building bridges.  Setting out to make a good first impression is always important when meeting someone for the first time.  Try smiling, it is contagious.  People recognize positive energy, just be genuine and consistent with who you are and others will be encouraged to engage in conversation. There is no need to be over the top, rather it is more about doing the small things that really matter.  For example, a friend of mine was walking into his local chamber of commerce meeting and held the door open for the person walking in behind him.  This simple gesture led to a conversation and potentially will lead to having a new client.  More importantly, a bridge was formed.  You never know who you might meet on a given day; you should be ready to set yourself apart from the others.  Be authentic, but standout!

Go out and ask questions but remember to listen.   Asking questions and getting to know someone is a very easy way to network. In return, be ready to answer questions about yourself in a confident yet humble manner.  You might want to have a line rehearsed about who you are and what you do.  Don’t make it robotic and be yourself; the more you do this the more natural it becomes.  Take this time to practice listening and follow the steps of becoming an active listener, it will take time but you will improve.  I know you may start daydreaming about how great your weekend is going to be and may miss an entire conversation but if all else fails when it comes to retaining anything from the conversation, at least remember their name.  People like hearing their name, pay them a compliment by remembering their name.  Master listening and you will set yourself apart from others, unfortunately most of us are too busy wanting to speak we forget to listen.  Nobody ever said it was going to be easy and it requires a lot of work but with a little practice we can master this skill.

I think the hardest part of networking is maintaining the relationships we have established.  Do you ever sit back and wonder what happen to a co-worker or college roommate?  When this happens to me, I find ways to reconnect and then practice keeping in touch.  A simple text message, email, or phone call goes along way yet it usually gets passed up because we are too busy.  The social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, & Linkedin have simplified this process for you.  It may take you a few hours to get these platforms up and running but after that you just need to check back periodicly. This is probably the easiest way to network with people.  It just takes a little time and you can make that happen, right? Taking the time to put out a little effort  lets others know you really care.  Stop making the excuse, there is no reason to lose contact with a friend or co-worker.  Do the little things that will keep you in touch.

CRUX: Take every opportunity to set yourself apart from others.  Do the little things like building bridges, listening, and making an effort to keep in touch.  This takes work and practice but focusing on others will ultimately lead to a chance for you shine.

“Success in life, in anything, depends upon the number of persons that one can make himself agreeable to.” -Thomas Carlyle

I originally planned on writing about networking, however establishing connections and maintaining rapport is an important starting point.  When it comes to developing and building relationships there are a few things you can do to create solid rapport.  How would you define Rapport?

When meeting someone for the first time it is important to seek common ground.  To begin with, you could research the person to find a common interest or topic of discussion.  This has become much easier recently due to social media platforms and the internet.  Creating this starting point will set up the basis for an engaged conversation you can build upon.

At the beginning of any relationship we should adjust our communication style accordingly as we begin to develop rapport.  You may need to change your pitch, tone, and vocabulary to match the level of the person you are conversing with.  Three types of styles include audio, visual, and kinesthetic.  People will give cues to the style they prefer through there words and actions.  I found a very interesting article by Joe DeVito called Conversational Coolers and Warmers which discusses conversation styles and characteristics of conversation. The purpose of engaging in this conversation is to build comfort and rapport, not to impress people.  

Next, we need to engage actively and lead through listening.  This is one of the most important skills to master, yet the least developed.  The key aspects of active listening involve: eye contact, focus, timing, and summarizing a conversation.  The most important part of actively listening is to actually listen.  Asking questions or giving verbal cues will allow you to seek a common understanding in the conversation and help with the retaining efforts.  For more depth, refer to a earlier post on Becoming an Active Listener.  

 Lastly, remembering names is an important aspect of developing rapport.  Using a person’s name makes them feel comfortable and even important.  By remembering someone’s name you are paying them a compliment.  So decide this is must, begin to associate that name with an object, picture, or even a word that rhymes with it and use their name in conversation. 

CRUX: Become an excellent communicator and build connections and rapport with people.  We must seek common ground, adjust our style, and take part in active listening.     

                                                                                                     
Every person, all the events of your life are there because you have drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.” – Richard Bach

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